When I remained standing for the first time during chapter elections, I thought my legs would fail me. I thought they would refuse to move and stay planted in front of my seat. But they didn’t. 

I walked out of that room that night as my chapter’s 168th term Orechet, and it changed not only my perspective of BBYO but also of an aspect of my life. As Orechet, I was tasked to document each program and event with pictures, specifically “cute ones,” per my chapter’s request. In my speech, I promised this. I promised I would take both posed and candid photos, photos that resembled the sisterhood and Judaism we embodied. More significantly, I vowed to take a weight off everyone’s shoulders by letting them live in the moment as I tried to capture it. I knew the memories we create in BBYO are ones to be cherished and how having pictures from those moments was the beating heart of reminiscing. So, I vowed that they wouldn’t have to worry about capturing the experience in any way other than their mind. They could be free at that moment if they allowed themselves to make the most of it. They didn’t have to be concerned about making sure they got pictures because, luckily, I was there to do the worrying for them. 

And worry, I did. I gave it my all. I was on my toes the second the program started, popping from place to place with my camera in hand. I leaped at the opportunity for a photo and was constantly saying, "Hey, can I get a photo of you guys?" By the end of the event, I had accumulated roughly  50 photos. 

I loved the photos I took. My digital camera gave the photos a feeling of nostalgia and community. I adored how they came out, but something was wrong. I would peruse the photos before sending them to our Mazkirah to be posted, and honestly, I found myself feeling left out that I wasn't in any of them. This was to be expected, of course, as I couldn’t simultaneously be taking the photo and be in it. This was what I signed up for. However, that wasn’t the actual root of the issue. The problem was that I had done exactly what I promised. While everyone else was living in the moment and enjoying the program, I was so fixated on capturing it all. By the end of my term, I discovered I didn’t want to be that person. Some people are perfectly content with being behind the camera all the time and focusing more on capturing than experiencing, but that’s not me. I wanted to be amidst it all, immersed in every sight, sensation, and feeling. 

My time as Orechet brought me so many great experiences. I earned a deeper understanding of BBYO and what it means, experiences  I wouldn’t trade for anything. For a while, I enjoyed being the one to hop around a program and document the experience everyone else was having, but after a while, that didn't seem to be the case. While it was amazing to be an Orechet for a term, I’ll admit I was relieved when it was over. I was ready to be the one in the photos. I was ready to allow myself to put my phone, camera, and worries away and allow myself to live in the moment as I had vowed to let everyone else do.